17/01/2018 - 08:00

52 MEN 52 WEEKS /#02 MEHMET EROĞLU: Woman

Anadolu! (Anatolia) [Ana means mother in Turkish, the writer puns here].

We are living in a country which is beautiful but bear no feminine characteristic other than its name.

Everything in these lands –maybe like in many countries- is masculine. This is a masculinity marketed with the sauce of rural and tribe culture and presented to us with conservatism label. This is a masculinity that values woman only in appearance: however, a woman is valuable only when she becomes a mother.

Furthermore, we hear that one birth is not enough and the number must increase. However, we know that a woman can be mother of everybody without giving a birth as well but even this argument is wrong: If you want to be valuable for rural, macho, patriarchal masculinity, you need more than being a mother: Belonging!

If the women who became mother are not our mothers, they are not that valuable and supreme beings. Don’t think I’m exaggerating, rather than it being a proof all those virtues, noble epithets granted to women by a masculinity, this is nothing more than a privilege that these country people grant only to women in their tribes. These are spared from the otherized others.

We are meeting with a concept, more precisely what is pushed into our minds, that comes to mind first about women and that is almost used exclusively for females. The name of this magical concept is morality, or rather woman morality.

If we take a closer look at this morality, which neglects social and conscientious side of it and serves to bridle women, we see that half of this concept comes from religious rules and customs and the other half from prohibitions.

Indeed, most of the bans –named as chastity- are against women and this hypocritical concept forms a –so-called- moral basis for masculine perspective that targets to own and subdue women.

Remember that murder is bad but honor killings can be seen justified let alone social tolerance but even in the eyes of law. What we call chastity is actually a set of prohibitions imposed on the women. The actions deemed as unchastely are seen as a quality in men.

Let us admit: There are things that women should do too in solution of problems such as violence against women, honor (chastity) killings, economic inequality: Yes, women breastfeed and love us but they don’t touch our minds. Shaping our minds is a task left to our fathers. This must change.

Isn’t the women’s one of the most dramatic, or tragicomic problems is all behavior norms and moral judgements about them being established by men?

Since monotheistic religions, all God, Allah and Prophet are father. Even if we accept that the conditioning against women has such a strong history that goes back to thousands of years, it is obvious that women have to break this circle.

Yes, left wall of the cell in which women are kept is built by men, right wall is built by religion and rear wall is built by morality but we should keep in mind that the front wall is built by woman’s self-consciousness.

Women should stop looking at themselves through men’s eyes and eyeglasses.

As women are beings who breastfeed men, all men are misogynists at the end of the day. I’ve observed this closely. This hostility doesn’t always surface in the forms of murder or violence. I am talking about men’s prejudices and disdain against women in every section of the society.

The societies that couldn’t solve women’s problems of freedom, equality and unfortunately surviving cannot be expected to be democratic. If a country doesn’t have freedom of expression, is famous with having the most number of imprisoned journalists and politicians instead of its success in the field of culture, science and sports, then women are not free in that country; her life is under constant threat.

What should be done? Even though the first step in solving the issues of women is to raise awareness, at the end of the day this is about being in power.

Everybody speaks about freedom but the number of who internalize it rather than speaking of it is very few. Freedom is like water, it cannot be divided and it is win again every day.

In this regard, women have more difficulties. In addition to everyday challenges, they also have to struggle against men. Winning victory at two different fronts! How difficult but also what a noble struggle this is. (ME/APA/TK)

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